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  After a few enquiries, we find the hospice. It is bright and cheerful, but its very existence is heartbreaking to me. The members of staff are friendly and kind, but a little resistant.

  “Are you family, because he has only just arrived, and he is quite weak.”

  “I’m not family, but I am a very close friend,” I say. “I am sure that he will want to see me.”

  “Well, pop your head round the door and see, but please don’t over tire him.”

  The door is open, and I tentatively look in. I make sure that I have a big grin on my face.

  Carl is pale and tired. How on earth could I have been so self-absorbed not to have noticed before? But he turns towards me and gives me a smile of the purest joy.

  “Joanna. How wonderful to see you again!”

  “Carl.” I take his hand. I am still smiling. “It’s my turn now.”

  * * *

  I know now that the hopes which I had been harbouring for a future with Carl can only ever be fantasies. I know that I will never again meet a human being as pure and unselfish as him. But I will spend what time is left to us with him, and, afterwards, come what may, I will look at life with a smile on my face, in his memory.

  Today’s the day I grew up.

  ~ ~ ~

  Clare Tanner is the author of The Tranquillity Project, a novel set in the near future.

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